From Blow Job to No Job

Sent in by an anonymous reader. Feel free to add your own in the comments.

Q. How many Richard Worth’s does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. None. Richard Worth only screws in Ministerial Limos.

John Key was surprised by how loyal Richard was at attending so many of his breakfast speeches at hotels around the country. Turns out, Richard was checking out and kept getting busted in the foyer by his leader!

Q. What’s Richard Worth’s favourite Auckland hotel?
A. The Rendezvous

It goes without saying that Richard Worth will not be allowed to speak at the upcoming National Party conference this weekend. Melissa Lee will instead be invited to share her thoughts on a winning attitude and how to defeat crime.

Richard Worth is likely to announce his resignation from Parliament this week. His reason? He wants to spend more time with his hairdresser.

Suggested NZ Truth headline: “From Blow Job to No Job!”

Rumoured words Worth said after resigning? “Well that sucks…”

Richard Worth is promising to tell all about his time as Minister. It’s not going to be a book, it won’t be a documentary, more of an oral history.

After this degrading sex scandal, National wants a return to traditional values – someone who cooks the books.

Worth’s wife reputedly wants to wring his neck, but the problem is it would only enhance his orgasm.

It’s rumoured Worth claimed medical insurance for his trysts – removal of fluid buildup

Worth is reported to have demanded an unusual sex act – a “68”. He gets a blow job, and he then owes the girl one.

Richard Worth’s portrait in Parliament has had to be taken down after it was caught hitting on Helen Clark’s portrait.

Richard Worth’s dirty emails makes Andrew Williams look normal!

When Richard Worth claimed his appointments were bipartisan, we had no idea he was referring to their sexuality!

Richard Worth is after his own talk show, which will mean that every night people will ask “Who’s on Worth tonight?”

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