An innovative defense?

A male escort tries it on and fails in the court:

The 24-year-old Linton man was taken into custody after texting an ex-girlfriend he had been ordered not to contact.

After Ponse limped into the dock on crutches, defence lawyer Mike Ryan advised Judge John Clapham that Ponse wished to make his own bail application.

“Reluctantly”, the judge accepted.

With his parents watching in the public gallery, Ponse said he had good reason to be allowed out of Manawatu Prison at Linton.

“I’ve got tickets to go to Singapore on October 1,” he said.

“I’m so looking forward to it.

“It’s no good for me when I’m in there. It’s better when I’m with my mates.”

On Saturday night, when he had texted his ex-girlfriend, he was with his friends. This was where he belonged, Ponse said.

And only two of the texts his ex had received were meant for her ? and they were sent to say sorry ? while the others should have gone to another friend.

For this, Ponse had been arrested.

“I forget about her when I’m with my mates and other girls,” Ponse said.

“[Prison] is no good. I’d rather just be able to see my mates.

“I don’t want to see this chick ever again. I can get so many other girls, I’m not worried about her,” he said.

“I can get any chick I want.”

Judge Clapham noted Ponse’s wish to travel and the number of “chicks” available to him, but denied the bail application.

He was remanded in custody until his next appearance on Monday.

I think Judge Clapham was being a bit too harsh. With a defense like that he is sure as hell a whole lot funnier than the presently out of work Jamie Linehan.