3 reasons why I won’t work for Andrew Little

Employ Slater?

Employ Slater?

Andrew Little has announced that I won’t be in contention for their advertised role for chief spin weasel in the Leader’s office.

The Labour leader stops short of saying the new communications director has to vote Labour, but says they need to be sympathetic to the cause.

“We don’t expect to employ Cameron Slater,” says Mr Little.

Be that as it may, it was always unlikely that I’d work for Andrew Little. ?

Here are my top three reasons:

3. The party largely lacks grace and talent. They have a lot of thoroughly ugly, graceless and talentless hacks as MPs when far more capable people should be promoted up the list or placed in winnable seats. Instead they have the likes of Trevor Mallard, Carmel Sepuloni, Megan Woods, and Sue Moroney taking up space?their benches. Most of these people have a face for radio and a body for “Biggest Loser”.

2. Socialists are notoriously bad payers…and to be frank, even though they will be dipping into the taxpayers pockets, I doubt they could afford me after all the publicity they helpfully provided me by continually naming me in parliament more than 300 times last year.

1. Andrew Little fails the most important rule?of all. I simply refuse to work with dickheads. Andrew Little is like the guy who always runs out the other batsmen as he collects singles in a lack lustre innings. He might score a century, but the team loses the test match.

So, tough luck Andrew Little, I wouldn’t work with you anyway.

There are of course many Labour MPs that I would and do work with…Andrew Little isn’t one of them.

I fully expect that Little has over the holiday break assigned some “heavy” hitter to continue to push Dirty Politics and attack me and John Key in the mistaken belief, that unlike last year, this year it will work…somehow…fingers crossed.

The sad thing is, even though they have discounted employing me, they really should have tried to hire me, they might win then if they did.

– 3News