Why even launch Neon?

Having been a consumer of Netflix and recently been given Lightbox 13 months free as part of my broadband sub, I’ve been watching Sky’s entry into the market with Neon with some bemusement. ?Their launch failed, but that aside, there isn’t actually much worth paying for. ? Regan at Throng takes them to task much better than I could:

– Pete


 

shitflixAfter delay after delay after delay, Sky turned on their new streaming video service in the middle of a beautifully sunny, Saturday afternoon.

Here is our list of reasons why Neon should be the last streaming video service you consider before signing up to a subscription.

10. Just take a look at all the glowing media coverage

9. Sky’s meteoric failure record.

Remember when Sky launched Igloo? Sky delivered a product that isn’t too dissimilar from Neon in that it provided a terrible product at a ridiculously expensive price in the hopes of reeling in anyone stupid enough to hand over their cash for such a service just to deliver some growth to their shareholders this quarter. Like Igloo, Neon has been delayed due to a clear misunderstanding of the market and developing a completely flawed product that no one wants.

8. Price gouging.

For what it is, Neon is the most expensive subscription video on demand product out there. At $20 per month, it’s practically double the price of Netflix, and 25% more expensive than Lightbox.

7. Sky’s very own definition of “Awesome” should terrify you.

I can’t even begin to believe how anyone thought this would be a smart thing to say when they knew that when they launched, Neon wouldn’t even be available in High Definition.

shitflix

I seriously think they need to update that image and change “always” to “ever”.

6. Have they ever heard of “Fast-tracking”.

While lightning fast delivery of television and movies via streaming services are the future, Sky are attempting to drag us back to the good old days where TVNZ used to delay screening shows for a year, or more. While you’d expect a new service like Neon to be competitive and use the muscle of Sky to bring content to viewers as quickly as possible, when it comes to hit shows like Game of Thrones, they’ll already be available on DVD. This means it won’t be hours, days, or weeks before the content that you’ve been waiting for is made available to you, but months. Many months.

And you thought the amount of time you had to wait for Neon to launch was a long time?

5. They don’t understand what viewers want.

This is what the old schedule system looked like:

old-schedule

This is what it looks like now:

new-schedule

4. Real change is powered by you

neon-powered-by-sky

3. Toddlers can even count the number of devices Neon is available on.

Unless you’re an apple fan, you don’t even need to concern yourself as to whether or not you should contemplate subscribing. Even then, Apple don’t appear to like them either.

According to Sky, this is awesome!

2. They’ve got some original first run content.

Despite having had such a stranglehold monopoly on content for so long, there isn’t a single thing that they’ve got that’s exclusive and first run worth crowing about. Neon is basically a dumping ground for all the crap shows they hold the rights to but don’t ever want to schedule on any of their channels. You might want to refer back to #8 again.

1. Do you really want to be that person that subscribes to that service?

While all your friends are enjoying Netflix, Lightbox, Quickflix or EzyFlix, you’ll be referred to as the shitflix subscriber.

 

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