Comedy corner: Non-PC jokes guaranteed to offend

Welcome to politically incorrect Comedy corner: the one place on Whaleoil where you are allowed to read and share naughty and offensive jokes that make us all laugh even though we are not supposed to. If you are offended by these kinds of jokes then please do not read this post.

A man goes to his doctor for an eye examination. They were talking as the doctor was examining his eyes, and in the middle of their conversation, the doctor casually said,
“You need to stop masturbating.” The guy replied,
“Why doc? Am I going blind?” The doctor said,
“No, but you’ve been upsetting the other patients in the waiting room.”

A lady runs into her doctor’s surgery screaming. She yells,
“Doctor, Doctor my breasts are hairy! What do I do?” The doctor asks,
“Well, how bad is it? How far does the hair extend?” The lady replies,
“From here all the way down to my penis!”

When I was young, I had no sense,
and stuck my dick on an electric fence.
It curled my hairs, it tickled my balls,
And it made me shit in my overalls.