Government?s Selective Heightened Income Tax plan announced (*Satire)

He looks pooped.

[…] Today the government?s tax working group recommended a form of capital gains tax known as ?Selective Heightened Income Tax? (SHIT).
Sir Michael Cullen had been talking SHIT for many years, so it was unsurprising to most commentators that a working group headed by him would come up with this SHIT.


The controversial plan could boost the government?s coffers considerably, meaning that it can expect to receive a lot of SHIT in the coming years.


The Minister of Finance denied that they would necessarily implement all the working group?s recommendations, however, leading to calls for him to ?own his SHIT?.

The Opposition was quick to point out several anomalous aspects of the new tax proposal, claiming that ?this SHIT doesn?t even make sense?.
One expert in taxation conceded that rates of capital gains tax are invariably difficult to reduce in practice, given governments? willingness to rely on new revenue sources. ?This kind of SHIT never goes down well?, she explained.


A lecturer in taxation and progressivism studies seemed more positive in praising the innovative aspects of the proposal, on the other hand, noting that the tax working group majority seemed to be ?making up SHIT?.
Asked for comment on how today?s proposal would be received, the prime minister hoped that the government?s broader agenda would inspire Kiwis? devotion: ?I absolutely believe people will buy into our complete Crown Revenue Appropriations Plan?.

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